Whether it be at work or home, I'm always thinking of what's best for someone else... at times, losing myself somewhere in the middle.
As a full-time working mom, my own alone-time is pretty rare. I go so hard throughout the day that when I do have downtime, I'd like to do something mindless... to be able to stop. This becomes a routine and I end up feeling like an empty casing of skin, a shell.
Recently, tired of feeling tired and staring at what used to be my favorite part of my body, but now looks just sad - My quads - I reintroduced myself to my dusty, but new, elliptical "Mo". She was finished being built in July 2010... And I'm finally breaking her in.
It's hard to find the motivation, put when I push myself to jump on Mo after Abby goes down for the night, for at least 30 minutes... It can do wonders (besides burn calories).
When I'm on the elliptical, it's just me so I'm forced to deal with my thoughts or emotions I don't have energy to acknowledge in my day-to-day. I will admit there has been a time or two where I'm near an emotional breakdown because I gain realizations while working-out.
Usually 5 minutes in, I'm already exhausted and my calves are burning. Never like before, I work up motivation and I find strength to push through! I'm rooting for myself and it turns out... I don't have to be my own worse enemy, but my biggest cheerleader.
For only having the 30 to 45 minutes of able exercise time, I'm reconnecting with my mind, body and soul - I feel my spirit reawaken and I'm more alive than ever. With every bead of sweat, I'm gaining back myself along with finding what was once lost - My confidence, motivation, inspiration... and a great set of quads.
Clarity, focus, ease and grace.